Sunday, August 12, 2007

Drink Tea



I drink a lot of tea. It's not something that came naturally, I used to be a coffee drinker, but in my defense that didn't come naturally either. At an old job there was free coffee from a service and the old room mate worked in a fledgling Starbuck's franchise. In a single day I would have consumed upwards of 13 cups of coffee, free of charge. The most productive and destructive time in my whole life.

The tea drinking I picked up from my mother's neighbors, a pair of lovely sisters from County Mayo. They would be on the adjoined porch when I came home and I simply could not pass them by without sitting for an hour or two. They scoffed at my sickening black coffee and offered me tea instead. At first it was an odd adjustment, it was dark like coffee but there wasn't the same explosion of energy. Sleeping, however, became possible and I noticed my bowel movements held together.

There is study after study revealing teas efficacy in treating this syndrome or that disease, but in fact - those things are all bullshit. If I experienced any health boost from drinking tea it was by eliminating soda and coffee from my diet. The versatility of tea, its range of flavors and colors, and the ease of brewing it is why I choose it now. I have had many HORRIBLE cups of coffee, some that were so nasty I poured them out after one sip, but tea really can't get screwed up.

The added bonus, tea uses little packaging. I buy it loose, but there is always the traditional tea bag. Between 80 - 300 servings come in one small container, when contrasted to 80 - 300 plastic bottles or aluminum cans you can visualize the benefit. I have seen pure unbleached special paper tea bags, which is overkill to the extreme. Really, the day tea bags become an ecological time bomb I will be a happy man.

A few tips:

Don't leave the tea bag in the water. Once it reaches your desired strength, take it out. Think of a stank, nasty pond, and all the gross leaves and stuff steeping in it. That is what your drink will become. This is the most common mistake of all.

Don't pour hot water directly on the tea bag. You can scorch tea and ruin it. This is especially true for green teas, which have to be brewed at a lower temperature. For green and lighter color teas, pour the water in first and let it cool down a bit, then add the tea. Don't forget to take it out.

If you add milk, sugar, lemon or whatever (I have used maple syrup) do it after. There is no reason for this, but a saturation point is lower with debris in the water. I am a puritan.

Wear dark colors. The probability of spilling shit all over yourself is high, and tea stains are a bitch to get out. Don't forget to brush your teeth. They get nasty quick.